


we're never going back home again

by crickets



Category: Lost
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-07-08
Updated: 2008-07-08
Packaged: 2017-10-02 05:59:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crickets/pseuds/crickets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>post s4, sawyer finds a new purpose</p>
            </blockquote>





	we're never going back home again

**Author's Note:**

> Words, 380. [Original Post](http://crickets.livejournal.com/165599.html).

By the time Daniel and the others on the zodiac arrive back at the beach, the entire camp is already looking to Sawyer to point the way. He feels strong that day, his body humming with adrenaline and life and purpose.

_He can do this._

-

Sawyer thinks best when the sun is highest in the sky. Everything is somehow clearer, no question who he is, his feet planted firmly on the ground. Sand gets washed away, structures go up, and everybody finds their place.

By the light of day, it doesn’t feel like that missed rescue was the end of them at all. It feels like maybe it was the beginning.

-

In the dark, the façade of their non-existence comes plainly into view. They are no one, and nowhere, forgotten and gone, no more discernable on a map than the edge of the ocean and the sand, storm clouds blotting out the moon’s silver rays. (But they're still here.)

He sits alone at night and questions things, wonders if he made the right choice, if there’s a way to take it back somehow.

“Don’t even think about it, James,” Rose says to him one night after dinner. “These people need you.”

-

Claire stumbles onto the beach one afternoon. She’s hungry and her feet are sore, but her hair smells like coconut shampoo, and Juliet tells Sawyer that there isn’t a single scratch anywhere on her, that she’s probably healthier than all the rest of them.

“Been looking for you, Mamacita,” Sawyer whispers next to her in the tent, after she’s eaten and can no longer stay awake.

She yawns and runs a hand through his hair. “I know,” she says.

Sawyer avoids mentioning Aaron. The time will come for that, and this isn’t it. But Claire doesn’t even ask – like she knows somehow, like maybe she’s okay with it all.

She ignores his questions of where she’s been, only tells him that she remembers feeling at peace, tells him that everything is going to be okay. “There’s nothing in the dark to be afraid of, Sawyer,” she says before closing her eyes. “Nothing at all.”

He sleeps next to her that night, close enough to feel the heat from her skin, afraid she’ll disappear again. But somehow, he knows she won’t.

_-fin_.


End file.
